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If you go to Britain, don't think that you'll understand the price, the weight or the size of anything. The British like to be different from everyone else.
If you want to know how far London is, someone will tell you it's ten or fifteen or thirty-five miles. "Miles? " you'll say. "What's a mile? " "A mile's one thousand, seven hundred and sixty yards," the Englishman will say."And what's a yard? " you'll ask. "A yard's three feet." "And what's a foot? " (You'll be rather tired now). The Englishman will tell you that a foot is the length of his foot. "But," you'll say, "some people have got bigger feet than others." The Englishman won't answer this: he'll tell you that there are twelve inches in a foot. "And what's an inch? " He'll tell you that an inch is the length of the top of his thumb.
You'll feel so ill now that you probably won't go to London. You'll probably go to the nearest pub and ask for a strong whisky! "A single whisky or a double whisky? '' the barman will ask. He'll tell you that, with a single whisky, you get a sixth of a gill of whisky in your glass. "A beer! " you'll say, weakly; and the barman will ask you if you want a pint of beer or half a pint.
The thing that makes most tourists unhappy is the temperature.*,"What's the temperature today? " the tourist asks, and the Englishman says that it's forty degrees. "Forty degrees? " says the tourist, looking at the snow! It's worse for people who go to a doctor's. The doctor looks at the thermometer carefully. "What's my temperature? "says the foreigner. "Ninety-eight,"says the doctor... and the foreigner asks himself why he isn't dead!
The sizes of English clothes are also different from the sizes in other countries — and men have different sizes from women. Always ask the shop assistant to measure you... or you'll find that the expensive jersey that you bought in London reaches to your feet!
When you're buying things in the shops, you must also remember that there are two pounds in Britain. One of them (?) tells you how much something costs, and the other (Ib.) tells you how much something weighs. If you ask for a pound of potatoes, you'll get them in a small bag. But if you ask for a pound's worth of potatoes, you'll need a lorry to take them away!
Britain's going to have the same weights and measures as other countries; but the British won't forget pounds, pints and feet for a long time. Until 1971, British money was very difficult. There were twelve pence in a shilling and twenty shillings in a pound (?). In 1971, new money was started, with a hundred pence in a pound. But, in the North of England, some people still write prices and bills in the old money!
The British people don't want to change their weights and measures. They'll tell you there are sixty minutes in an hour; why shouldn't there be eight pints in a gallon? And why is it better to drive on the right of the road than to drive on the left?
* English newspapers give the temperature in Centigrade degrees (° C), but, when they speak, English people give it in Fahrenheit degrees (° F).