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Everyone knows what British buses are like. They're usually double-decker buses — buses with two floors. In most big towns, they're red; and in the country, they're green. But few foreigners know how difficult it is to travel by them.
First, everyone must stand in a line at the bus-stop. This is the British queue. If you don't stand in the queue, the British think you want to get on to the bus in front of them, and become angry. You'll have to wait in the queue for a long time; but, when your bus comes, five others with the same number will come with it. This is because the bus drivers feel lonely if they don't all travel together.
And because you've waited for an hour in the rain or in the snow, it doesn't mean that you'll be allowed to get on to the bus when it comes. "Full up" the conductor will probably say. This means that all the seats are taken and there are five people standing. The conductor isn't allowed to have more people than this on his bus.
Then there are the bus-stops with Request written on them. Request stops are a British idea to puzzle foreigners. You wait for a bus for a long time, and, when it comes, it drives past the bus-stop. "It's a request stop," the British will tell you. "If you don't put out your hand, the bus doesn't stop. You'll have to wait for the next bus. .."
If and when you get on to a bus, you'll find that the conductor speaks his own language."Hold tight, please! " he'll say — which means "Be careful. The bus is leaving" -, or "Upstairs only" - which means that all the seats downstairs are taken. If you want to smoke or you've got a dog with you, you'll have to go upstairs. Never take a large dog on to a London bus: the stairs are very narrow!
A lot of British buses haven't got doors, and the British jump on and off the buses when they want to. But be careful: this is more difficult than you think!
If you think it's easier to travel by train, London's got very good underground trains. They're called the Underground or the Tube. Each line of the Tube has got a name — the Central Line, the Northern Line, the Victoria Line. .. And each line has got its own colour on the map that you see in the stations. The Tube trains and all other British trains have 'No smoking' carriages where you mustn't smoke. If you smoke in them, the other passengers will be too polite to ask you not to smoke, but they'll start coughing very loudly!
London taxis are as well-known as London buses. They're small and black; they've got a yellow light at the front and. when it's on. it means that the taxi's empty. When an Englishman wants to stop a taxi, he puts out his arm or his umbrella!
Everyone in London tries not to travel in the 'rush hours'. These are from half-past eight to halt-past nine in the morning, when the commuters are rushing to get to work, and from five o'clock to six o'clock in the evening, when they're rushing to get home. The buses are all full and there are hundreds of people on each Tube. Newspapers are torn, umbrellas are broken, hats fall off; but the British are always polite. They always say: "Sorry! " when they walk on your foot and "Excuse me! " when they want to get off.